He was a good OP, of impeccable character. How are you? Youre like Monday: no one likes you. He's jokingly texting if you're ok. Here's one to use when you're having a spectacular day. 1. Then they throw dirt in your face. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! 2. Id smack you, but that would be animal abuse. Financially? Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. Through humorous musings about Scalia's . 57. Its a before picture in one of those plastic surgery magazines, isnt it? Youll never be even half the man your mother is. Like "I am not a Sunday morning inside four walls with clean blood and organized drawers. Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. 28. Rather than kicking yourself later when you think of something clever you should have said, keep a few witty insults and comebacks at the ready, just in case. 73. 40. Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. Its always annoying when people take a long time to reply. 71. "I'm alright, mate". The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. 4. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. Im in a relationship with myself. 3. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? I love you. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. You want to make them laugh, not yell. Have you been thinking? Even if life is rough, be happy that you're still alive. Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." If I had a tail, I would wag it! 39. Now that is pretty f****** funny. Maybe because I like pineapples on my pizza? Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. Im sorry. Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. Is it your job to spread ignorance? You should really come with a warning label. As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now. Im too fine for the ugly, yet too ugly for the fine. I'm loved! Now, I understand why some animals eat their young. Thinking of you not existing makes me want to masturbate. A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? Congrats, guys! But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. Today, well look at 30 ways you can respond to a late message or reply. Make sure the person you say this to is able to take a joke. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. When someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel like an empire could have risen and fallen in that time. Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. 1. Oh, a thought crossed your mind? 1. With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . You have an old soul. Sometimes, it can be hard thinking on your feet, especially when youre joking around with your friends or in the midst of a heated exchange. Are you going to help me have a good day? But, if they were, it would be a valid reason for them taking so long to reply. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Finnish with this conversation! Be grateful if it happens in that order. David Gerrold (author), Self-decapitation is an extremely difficult, not to say dangerous, thing to attempt. WS Gilbert (dramatist), I bequeath my entire estate to my wife on the condition that she marries again. I'm not Hal and we're not in space. You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. Thats because I eat Doritos chips too loudly. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. All rights reserved. 12. Read about the differences between burning alive, staying alive and being dead or alive as we explore the many ways of keeping ourselves in the land of the living. Physically? - Anonymous. Overwatch 2 Friendly Reminder To Leave a LIKE & SUBSCRIBE, ThanksJoin this channel to get access to perks:https://www.youtube.com/cha. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on January 20, 2020: Shing Araya from Philippines on January 08, 2020: All are witty and funny at the same time. Alternatively, you can let them know you are doing well but still need time to process your emotions. 38. Same thing you're doing, talking to you now. Living an amazing dream. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Things can't get much better and you want the world to know. [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. Ill get back to you tomorrow when the results are in. Dear family and friends of Arthur Dayn, As we enter into an unprecedented dark age with the invisible enemy known as COVID-19, the life of our dear friend Arthur Dayn ends. A real low-life. You enjoy making this girl smile and make her day with your humor. Do you like nature, despite what it did to you? However, you can check out some of our ideas if you want to shake things up and change how you respond to how are you?. Whilst university does present some challenges, it does not mean you need to take several days to reply to a message.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_16',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_17',108,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_1');.large-leaderboard-2-multi-108{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Its going great, really! But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. I died last week, since then. If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. When I eat cake, I flip it upside-down just so I can lick the icing off the plate! Its more likely that theyre just being a bad friend. 2. I've Tried, but No One Listens, If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me, Better than I Was a Minute Ago, Because You're Here, Okay, Because My Name Wasn't in Today's Obituaries. Your question is registered, we will answer when in the mood. Playful and sassy dig, then blocked. 15. Im still waiting for my Superman/Wonder Woman. I didnt realize it at first, but I grew up and turned into a Squidward. 3. Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. Scroll down! Then you die. Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?". "Can't complain" is a normal response to the question, but by throwing in the following sentence, you should get a laugh. Did someone leave your cage open? Then I hope you find someone whos good looking, honest, smart, and cultured. You are living proof that manure can learn to walk and talk. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. Things could be worse I could be you (for siblings ). My bad, its just your mouth. 9. 41. When a date's playing it hot and cold or you haven't heard from your crush in weeks, these witty ghosting responses will help you clear the air and your mind. Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's butt and wait. Which one you use would depend on particular circumstances, but in the example you gave, I think "still alive" probably works best. Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. 6. Maybe they like you so much that it triggered some kind of reaction that ended their life. You don't want to be rude, but it's okay to give them a little sarcasm by using this phrase. If you were twice as smart as you are now, youd be stupid. I play hard to get even if nobody is trying to get me. Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. 53. Good luck feel free to drop me a comment below if you have any funny responses I should add to the list, and do let me know if you get any memorable responses back. Could have been worse, right. Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. 3. What's your sign? 93. It might seem like a joke, but this is what I think. This answer is correct because the best responses to "how are you" should contain an adverb. "Accept the facts for what they are, and be grateful you're not being strung along or played.". And if they don't reply to this, you can walk the walk away. Impressive! You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. There are nosy people everywhere! I am not sure what you mean. Dont wake me up yet. Same thing youre doing, talking to you now. I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. Theyre incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their whole day. Whats with all these questions? Reply. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. Youre about as sharp as a bowling ball. 35. The answer is simple. There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". WHY!? Search, discover and share your favorite Still Alive GIFs. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. 62. Your birth certificate is an apology to your parents from the hospital. I could never tell when someones flirting with me or if theyre just being nice. 16. The person who told you to be yourself gave you some bad advice. Thats no excuse for treating someone like they dont exist, especially since 85% of participants said theyd rather be told upfront that someones not feeling it. He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. My guardian angel be like 2. 86. Herodotus (historian), "At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. - Anonymous. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? 84. You nervously reply "yeah, but I'm a little busy and-", only for one person to reply "um, no one asked you. Over The Phone or On The Phone Which is Correct? Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok The living are getting rarer. Eugene Lonesco (playwright), Dying is easy; its living that scares me to death. Annie Lennox (musician), If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button. Sam Levenson (humorist), Ive looked that old scoundrel death in the eyes many times but this time I think he has me on the ropes. Douglas MacArthur (general), Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. Wilson Mizner (playwright), The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. Demetri Martin (comedian), I intend to live forever or die trying. Groucho Marx (comedian), Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. William Somerset Maugham (author), The art of dying graciously is nowhere advertised in spite of the fact that its market potential is great. Milton Mayer (author), At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. It's best part of the whole movie. I havent met the right one yet. " Actually, you're mad" is a version of the classic, rhetorically sophisticated comeback "I'm rubber, you're glue." This one is the white-belt level of "who's mad?" martial arts a simple. I used to think you were a pain in the neck. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. 3 I'm Just Wondering How You Are Why would you talk to someone at their convenience when they wouldnt speak to you when you needed them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_2',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. 12. Happy, and I know it. IDK, pick your favorite fictional player. Hopefully, youll stay there. Its not my choice, but its still a choice. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. Nice outfit. Because Ive been waiting for you all my life. 4. 24. I always yawn when Im interested. 92. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. Some people spend all their time on their phone. 13. and our As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. 80. Privacy Policy. June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . You win the internet. "Still alive" is polite. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. 36. Does the new one work any better? Another excuse that people use is Im just hoping in the shower. 81. 14. If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Do you want the short or the detailed version? Tell them to stop being nosy and avoid answering. If theyre too busy to text you back, you need to be too busy to continue having them in your life, or on your social media. It can be good to just say it how it is. Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." Instead of listening to your opinion, how about I put on some cartoons for you, and get you a juice box? Just look what happened there! I will leave that up to your imagination. She is a Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner from The Priority Academy and has over 17 years of experience in content writing and editing for online media. 79. Cant complainI have tried, but no one listens. Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. 54. But it does help if you know your audience when responding to someone. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. What to say when your crush asks how you are? No, not really. "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. 25. Then the worms eat you. There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". Conspiracy theorist group QAnon hit a bizarre milestone on Tuesday, when its supporters gathered for what they believed would be the return of the late JFK junior - who, they postured, would be. Virginia Woolf (author), "When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction." Feel my shirt. Passed into the next room and told me to tell you go fuck yourself. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
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