They probably do still have soemthing going on. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. If the relationship was toxic then this is how it can affect you. He doesn't care about upsetting YOU, but God forbid SHE ever gets upset. Shes married my son seems to love the guy. What is love without respect? I'm so sorry. If he is your friend and he calls you mama then it would be a sign that he wants to be more than just friends with you. patito. When trying to understand why he called you mama and the way that he feels about you it would be helpful to consider the way that he reacts to seeing you. It would be just too complicated for me. Realistically if i didnt have a daughter with her i wouldnt mind her getting hit by a train. Latest Boyfriend Calls Me Mommy updates. And guess what? But that's after his mom died and even though I even wiped her when she peed herself fed her slept on the floor with him for the whole 30 days in the hospital I caught a attitude cuz he yelled at me and I said some shit to the extent in the argument that I'd go get some bomb ass dick. If he is allowing her to do what she is doing, then he is moron who wants his bread buttered on both sides. I don't need him financially . Show him you have self respect and know your worth. He may talk about difficult situations he's experienced, as well as his ultimate goals career-wise and romantically. But he doesnt know his boundaries. No. I tell him, "Either call me my name, M's momma, or just don't say shit at all. Oct 29, 2013 at 11:36 AM. He wants to stay in her life . However, if he begins to act in strange ways in any situation that involves his baby mama, you might need to pay attention to any red flag his actions portray. +1 y. So I have a question to the men and would appreciate an honest opinion and advice. Xper 3 Age: 38. This dude barely ever get dressed not even for me. Let him go. I hate my boyfriends baby and the baby mama drama. This has been going on for over a year and I feel bad for the girl who has no idea or maybe suspecta like you and I know how that feels as he was lying to me when he was cheating on me with her. Think about that before you waste your time wondering if he cares for you and what is going on. He compliments your appearance. Makes no sense bc his father wasn't in his life so why would he put our daughter through that knowing how it feels?! However, you be heard far too many stories like this were the baby's mom uses the baby to keep a guy trapped in a relationship or to force him back. They'll be others." Find a great single dude, forget about this dude, even if the sex was out of this world, use logic when picking your men, the emotional shit is what has you in pain, the logic told you to leave. Sadly .. a friends brother did something similar. Trust issues with a guy with baby mama drama. Is it petty to be upset about your partners co-parent contacting them at unsuitable times? He tells me I need things to die down in my home our kids are not so little not to tell me whats going with them at school or anywhere. If my ex was serious about her even if he cheated on me with her, for our son I would be fine with meeting her. Miss Lucy called the doctor, Miss Lucy called the nurse. Because he's not the one who did the dumping, it's safe to assume that if it was up to him, they'd still be together. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); My Boyfriend Calls Me His Baby Mama Is This Normal? I made sure that all of her needs are met. She was upset with him because if any of his bm's call, he'd talk to them in her presence, but every time he called me or I called him, he left. A time log then bring it up to him only once if he doesn't correct the situation with the BM then there's your point he wants both of them or there's a possible affair going on between the two of them and if he does not my advice is move forward its not just about the baggage he will bring its the drama he will keep take care and good luck. You hit it on the nail. I will never let my daughter go through that I went through ever . I feel really bad for your situation see Im female though who has done nothing but stick by her man even though he's done nothing but treat me like shit, they way he talks to me, calls me every name under the sun, our son is one month old and I've jusy found that hes been messaging girls behind my back, this is the third time of him messaging girls and I really don't know what to do, I don't want my son to have a broken family but I've just got to the point where I think he will never change I've been loyal to him took him in and everytime we argue I feel bad in kicking him out because he has nowhere to go so today even though ive seen him message girls he's lay in my bed whilst I'm in the bath holding back tears wondering what I done wrong to be getting treated this way, This is some real ass shit, I swear if every man and woman was as straight up as this. Do I act crazy? I mean it's obvious to me, he's using you both. i think i made the right choice. Six freaking years. Idk what to do , how to feel , I love this man to the fullest and we have finally got worked on us , she was 8 month pregnant and he didn't tell me . Why is he spending all of his free time with his ex and ignoring you? Xper 5 Age: 27. I have talked to other girls trying to find something new in hopes to get over her. Miss Lucy called the lady with the alligator purse. I of course love him and I can't help it. He also wants me to remove the restraining order I have against him. He's complaining about you to her, and she can't respect you because she knows your secrets and fears. In any case, don't give him that attention. Why do you feel the need to prove your worth? However he still talks to her and they seem close. I have a child with my ex and the only thing we talk about is our child and that is between reasonable hours (after 9 am and no later than 9 pm) anything else is extra. I felt bad because in that moment she realized that I'm not the monster he painted me out to be. He was selfish and mean and I felt so alone but i just wanted my son to have his father and I knew he wouldn't be around unless I took care of him. Take the initiative and tune out your mind or heart telling you that youd drop everything on a dime if she wanted you. They like ages between 21-25. I was devastated and it all made since, but he took away my choice in this. Sounds messed up to say but I wouldn't date someone with a child. This son of a bitch could have came in the toilet or on the floor but didnt so I have to live with the biggest mistake i ever made i regret the day i ever met him and if i could take it all back i would. But he tells me that shes a crazy b**** and shes mental Is that not considered cheating? He's playing her and was trying to play me again.. I don't think I could ever be in another relationship with another woman! You don't need to be someone's hidden secret. For others, it's a deep hatred or a lasting love. During the summer he tried to reach out to me , but I was done , I was over him , over the drama . If he doesnt stop saying it after youve asked him to, thats when you do have a problem. I love him so much and fought for two years to make sure he was involved. He tried to eat the bathtub But it wouldn't go down his throat. Regarding always want the family together? We've joined the BHM Digital family of websites and have updated our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. He was nasty to me for a while and wasn't in my daughters life besides paying money for four month until recently he started trying to do things as a family so once a week we all go out and do something. As a woman who didn't want a child, yet you are sleeping with random men-you had the choice of birth control OR not to sleep with a man you werent in a committed relationship with. The same goes for texting her. I always give him the benefit of the doubt because i want to trust him but is he really loyal to me? He told me that he will tell her about us but just not right now. I would never date a guy with a baby mama. Your boyfriend needs to be mature enough to accept that you dont like being called his baby mama and not get offended by it or go against your wishes. But its really hard. AskMen, Become a Better Man, Big Shiny Things, Mantics and guyQ are among the federally Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. If youre not sure what your guy means by it, you should ask him! You should be ashamed of yourself. I was so loyal to my daughters father. My question why does my ex insist on having sex with me if he is so happy with his new girlfriend. Any advice ? If he doesnt, it sounds like a continuous headache waiting to happen for the woman I know, who really deserves better. If he feels a need to talk in secret to his baby mama without your knowledge, then there's more going . Does he drink socially or in the evening? She asked me to leave when things got rough in hopes of fixing us. Should they even talk after a certain time of night? There is no such thing as package deal in this situation when she keeps calling for nothing. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. So that happend a month later he FaceTimes me I pick up he says he just wanted to see me. Absolutely NOT! cuz u know u have to deal with the drama that his baby mama will cuz. So, I would therefore encourage him about the situation. etc. . Cool. Dear Carolyn: My husband has a child by his ex-girlfriend. I hope that my website can help condense the wide amount of body language information available and allow you to make full use of it in your daily life. Ignore the fact that the wife back home can't do the same. And stupid me did everything she asked. So long story short they don't have to love the baby mama for you to hear them talking about her or for you to feel insecure. He left for another girl And barely had anything to do with our daughter. He needs to let you go so he can be with his family even if you think it's his ex and she lives with him as family not as a room mate. For instance, I came across a woman sharing her concernsaboutthe mother of her boyfriends child calling, texting and even showing up at his home at all times of the night: I am currently in a relationship with a guy who has broken up with his babys mother. These deep conversations not only mean that he may . They divorced 18 years later. Why don't you upgrade to a nice stable upper class life? 2023 ZIFF DAVIS CANADA, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. And hopefully, she can finally be back in my arms. For example, you may say "hey, pick that up," and they'll respond "ok, mom." So, yes, it's like you're nagging them like a mother. Which never happened. I call my boyfriend heartbeat and he call me mama sometimes he change and call me queen. Anyway he was hiding her they where going out to dinner together and the kids and I noticed the biggest diff when he was talking to her on a daily and he started doing way more then he ever did for them he ain't even do more for the other two he had with other ppl. This can cause friction. I avoided him at all cause I was not ready to see him. Long story short, he put her back at arms length once the baby came, and she tried to kill herself a couple of times. But now im done taking it. I created and currently manage Body Language Central, one of the premier sources for body language-related knowledge. My ex still co texted me and I told him if he continued I would file a restraining order for harAskMent. Sad, but true. True. Shes happy and I try to be civil with the step parent even tho I wanna rip his head off lol. She left him. Wooo, some you ladies need to learn the game, y'all losing. And he is present on and off in her life. He may be meaning something more than he likes you by saying it, youre going to have to ask him what exactly he means. In the end the now wife told her that she was just 'keeping the bed warm', while she wasn't there. Who knows what'll happen." After awhile the interactions became flirty. I have been playing both roles as mother and father for the past 16 years taking the responsibility financially, physically, and emotionally. Speak up, tell him how you feel and if he doesn't take a stand then you know that he really isnt worth it. Or you can say you would tell his baby mama about your affair with him. And I loved him. Never ever mate a ex is a ex and that's where they belong I look forward to meeting my new fresh man and new future. (She was staying with her sister and her man) she tried to say he was one of their friends. He hasn't seen our daughter since I found out the reason why he left. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. And she has a very tight relationship with his family. Between the two of them they are always arguing or in some fight every few days. I'm in this same situation. I don't know what to do. I have always loved my children's father and I always will; but we're friends now and that's what counts. I have no attraction nor care about my daughters mother. He must have made a ton of money or you were paying for everything. When I first met him he had a daughter , and was living with a female other than his daughters mother. Talk to him about this and ask him to do something about it. Of course, its not the only way to show that hes committed to you, but its a good start! 10 Cleaning Rules for Roommates To Create A Spotless Home! If it was about the kids I can understand, but no it's either about how her hair dresser messed up her hair, or about some stupid stuff. So last night I had texted my boyfriend something really nice a memory and such. Its essential that the boyfriend, who is in the center of this situation, make it clear to his childs mother what is appropriate, that hes in a committed relationship with you, and that he should only be contacted when it has to do with the child they share. He admits to getting me pregnant on purpose, thinking we were going to be together. He grew up a little bit and I grew some self-respect because I know that I deserve to be treated with nothing less. Hell NO! We wanted to make sure that his kids were secure and settled before we took the big step. I don't need anything from him but him. Whereas, if he only calls you mama and he shows different behavior and body language around you then it would be more likely that he is attracted to you. but had you been on birth control he wouldn't have been able to "trap" you as you call it. Guys follow me always did always will I will never follow them! Never belittled her! Honestly? No. This is a clear signal that he's really into you, wants a relationship, and is showing it by calling you baby. III. Deep down they are still hoping or wishing things had worked out differently, especially if there wasn't something major like abuse or cheating going on. When she gets older she'll catch on how he treats you and think that's the way things are supposed to be. Just like your boyfriend shouldn't be hanging out with his baby mama, she also needs to respect the fact that he's in a new relationship. Do they respect you? I had just had a baby, so with the follow up appointments, we knew nothing was wrong with me, so he had to confess he crept around. my boyfriend now pampers me with love, care and attention. She's expected to be a nun. Ive been with a couple girls intimately but pales in comparison to her. You hope shes treated fairly and the same if not better if he decides to have children with your bm, but you can take control and see your daughter more if your bm isnt a nut case. But he's careless . And probably always will be. I and my boyfriend rekindled and we are back together. our son is a month now but we.broke up Aug 17 and.didnt stop having sex until October while he was with his ex girlfriend/new fiancee..he left me for his ex..now after.we had our son we.doing so parenting he wants.to have sex. Fortunately for me, he was someone who told her not to bother him unless it has to do with the kids and it was urgent. We only contact through a talking portal online, where everything is recorded for the judge. Your bm had a profound effect on you. Or else they would be with them! Is okay so recently he told the kids he would take them to the movies but he never asked the kids what type of movie they wanted to see he bought the tickets and our kids paid no mind to the fact that they didnt know what movie they were going to see until they got to the theatre so when they get there he has a fit because his wife his wifes kids who are his step kids they dont have kids of their own made decision to watch a movie that they all agree on I guess while our kids whom he made plans with were not in on this movie decision making. And he doesnt help financially. I love him and deep down I have a feeling that maybe we will be together in the future. But you can go by what you see and hear in order to make an intelligent decision. What can I do to fix it ? Know who's talking to whom when. This is not a good way to start anything with a cheater! He says it was a mistake, and he loves both me, but he has to be with her because she is carrying his child. Reguardless of how long they have been together. The reality is you can do better. Move on.. GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY! She knows all about me and I know all about her but we never met in person and when I tried to reach out to her myself she told my bf that I messaged her .. she blocked me too. Body language plays a key role in our daily lives. He wasn't hiding her before his fiance came over and his parents knew her too. He compares you to her (ya'll could be in a constant competition because if he loves her, he values her more) 2. If this is the case, then its a good thing! You know yall arent compatible, you know this. But I do want to add one small tidbit here, I see a lot of guys saying their "baby momma" got too much drama - all I think when I read that is 'why does she have drama?'. So here's my situation and question I need a mans perspective. Reply. A few of the signs to look out for that might confirm - or help deny - this are: He's always the one that initiates contact with her or he's always the one replying first. Please Help. Good one dear u made use of ur sharp brain quickly. Or is it a real problem? when a man have a kid(s) with his ex(s) they are a package deal.if u want to be with him, u have to be supportive n understanding and don't stress him out cuz he is not giving u enough time.this can lead to fights n eventually a break up. Babe. Me and my baby mama have been separated for close to 1 yr n half our son is 2. My boyfriend and I don't hang out for a long time because he has to go home so that the baby mama doesn't suspect anything. I do not like for my ex to call me that and I have asked him not to. He should set bounders and let her know that your are first in his life. Know your worth. Am I wrong to feel that way? It was a hot mess but I made sure he heard my take on all this because he barely spend s time with his kids and I dont nag him about it kids will learn one way or the other who their parent is down the line but Im just so fed up I dont know if all this has to do with the stupidness that happen because if it does its so ridicuous all because hes married. When he throws a new one at me, I tell him "She's not the one. Community Experts online right now. He said she hacked his fb and put it so they in a relationship and changed the password but i saw it today and it says he posted about his school finals a week ago when he had them. If your boyfriend is confident, charming, and persuasive, you might think you've hit the jackpot. MadameNoire Copyright 2023 BossipMadameNoire, LLC All Rights Reserved | BHM Digital. women are spiteful ****. 1 - He Loves You Deeply And Calls You Baby Because It's A Sweet Nickname When You're In A Relationship. Call him immature, call him a boy, call him selfish and needy or a narcissist. I found this post as I was looking to try and understand why my ex baby daddy was texting me that he wanted to get back together when he's in a relationship and to my knowledge has been in a relationship with the girl he cheatred on me with. You acting proud. and all I see, is just a lack of self esteem. We were in an 18yr relationship which eventually ended last year. His bm hates me and always calls me a **** claiming she's dating him anytime we talk. SMH. If I'd wanted kids I would have had my own. In some cases, a guy might start calling you his baby mama because hes trying to drop a subtle (or not so subtle) hint that he wants to have children with you. Performance & security by Cloudflare. I tried for six years to be with my sons father. I have never met his baby mama. Sorry, but I would not tolerate this. so yeah I'll just do what I gotta do . They think that nothing bad can happen to them and that they were in love with each other. Try to get him to bundle up all the time, even during sex. It's just normal to me. 9. No. I would have to say that his baby mama and kid(s) is a package deal to a certain extent because you would have to put up with her for as long as you are with him. Please contact your hosting provider to ensure that an up-to-date and valid SSL certificate issued by a Certificate Authority is configured for this domain name on the origin server. explicit permission. **** that. I'm trying to move on, but its hard. Let me break it down for you. Said my mind's gone half crazy (Yeah) 'cause I can't leave you alone (And I just don't know) And I'm wonderin' if it's worth me holdin' on (I said I just don't know what to do now . He's married for better/worse, in sickness/health till death due you part! If I choose to deal with himnever his decision. 265 views, 5 likes, 10 loves, 28 comments, 2 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Bethel AME Church: Bethel AME Church was live. Where i tell the woman i choose to mess with the truth of how i feel. If your boyfriend is talking to his baby mama everyday, there is the obvious concern that he's still involved with her in some way. There's plenty of men out there who are looking for a good woman. I havent heard from him or her. How do you deal with picking schools and the bigger decisions when it comes to your child? Fast fwd hes married still hes out of jail and it took me a good 6 months before I came face to face with him. He should tell her to not call so late at night unless it's an emergency. What to do when u r confronted by your boyfriend's baby mama Boyfriend who won't be a man. Honestly, you just need to be single for a while, finish school, and work on yourself and your child. I feel you on all that. But if hes saying it now, you can be pretty sure hes going to be calling you his baby mama if you do have a child together! I think people often underestimate how big of a deal it really is to have a child with someone especially if you have that child with someone you dont plan on staying in a romantic relationship with. International custody disputes are a big hot mess. So you have no right to judge them on that. I do love him, I have met his family and they are really nice and caring towards me. So hard to want to date. What do you do when your boyfriend dont defend you to his baby mama. Bounce out baby. I didn't make the world that way; it's just the way it is. Even if you did you still have no right to judge them. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number. Now that's understandable, cheating game horrible and I strongly believe no woman should take away the father right wanting to spend time with their child. Point is she says I will always be first on the list and she says she isn't dating this dude but their intimate and he cares for her. I did it again. Reply. I blocked his number. If he can't, it might be a sign you're dating a mama's boy and it could be in your best interest to cut him loose. My kids father and I have the craziest relationship many of whom know are past say he love me still but wont admit it. Um - each situation is different I guess. But yet I will never be good enough!!! I thought we moved on with our lives, so then he calls me every three months, getting upset. i feel after 3 yrs she has to grow up. When you're dating a guy and he's not using your real name and calling you baby, instead, it means he loves you. I just have on question can my spouse has kids from a previous relationship( has to Baby mama's ) and they call him he hold conversations with them I don't know if it's about the kids because he will say things like yea she called me earlier today talking about this and that but if it was my daughter father calling me it's a problem but you can hold full blown conversations with both you bm's not to mention his 11 yrs older then me at times I don't know what to do or say to him without sounding childish or ridiculous but I hate the feeling that he's doing things behind myou back.
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